


Crime and Punishment

by Dimity Blue (Arnie)



Category: White Collar
Genre: Gen, Humor, Kid Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-11
Updated: 2015-10-11
Packaged: 2018-04-25 21:17:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4976872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arnie/pseuds/Dimity%20Blue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Peter's babysitting. It's not going well.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Crime and Punishment

Peter resisted the urge to sigh as the miscreants stood in front of him. "Diana, did you hit Neal?"

At the direct question, she raised brown eyes to meet his and confessed. "Yes."

"Neal."

Neal stopped rubbing his arm and his hand dropped to his side as he shot a guilty look at Diana.

"Why did Diana hit you?"

His reply was prompt. "'Cause I took her sucker."

Peter wanted to sigh again. Why did he always end up in these situations? "That was wrong, Neal. That's stealing. Stealing makes you a thief. I have to arrest thieves."

Neal raised big eyes to look at Peter. "Are you gonna 'rest me?" Peter couldn't decide if he looked scared or excited at the thought.

"No, because you're five. If you were an adult and you stole, I'd have to arrest you and put you in jail. Don't steal again. Now, apologise to Diana for taking her sucker."

"Sorry, Diana." The apology was accompanied by a repentent look from Neal's big blue eyes, and Peter had a strong feeling Neal was used to using them to get out of trouble.

Peter wasn't sure Neal got it, but he let it go. For now. "Diana, hitting people is wrong unless you're defending yourself. Apologise to Neal for hitting him."

Diana promptly said, "Sorry, Neal," but Peter was pretty sure her eyes were saying, 'Do it again and I'll kill you.'

For now, though, Peter would take what he could get. "Well, then. Neal, go do some colouring. Diana, go play with your dolls."

As Neal returned to colouring in a picture of the Sistine Chapel, Diana gathered up her GI Joes and began storming the rebel fortress (cardboard box) high on the mountainside (coffee table). Peter rubbed his hands over his face. Never again. No matter how much of an emergency the Caffreys had, Peter wasn't going to agree to watch Neal if he'd already agreed to watch Diana. No, siree. Maybe that way there could be peace in the Burke househo -

Peter's thoughts screeched to a halt as he saw Satchmo. A happy Satchmo. A happy Satchmo with a bright green tongue lolling out of his mouth.

"You gave your sucker to my dog?!"

" _My_ sucker!"

"He was hungry!"

The end.  
11th October 2015.


End file.
